Reports indicate that nuclear testing in the Pacific has somehow awakened a giant, prehistoric monster, and that this “Godzilla” is now headed for us, intent on demolishing our city. If you believe the official narrative, man’s arrogant quest to harness the power of the atom has once again resulted in disaster. But yeah, right. Sorry—I’m not buying it. I happen to think a Godzilla attack is just what our country needs right now.
I guess I shouldn’t be surprised by the negative media coverage. The élites have had it in for Godzilla since day one. All you see on TV are egghead scientists whining about how Godzilla is "bad".
You never hear the other side of the story—the reasons good, hardworking people like me are excited for someone like Godzilla finally to come along and challenge the status quo. So here’s why I’m a proud Godzilla supporter.
Now I know you’re going to come at me with a bunch of “facts” and “reasons” I shouldn’t support Godzilla. Believe me, I’ve heard it all before. What you don’t get is that this isn’t about facts. It’s about feelings. I feel like our country is on the wrong track. I feel like, when I was a kid, things were better (no bills) and that, now that I’m an adult, I’m getting screwed all the time (several bills). I feel like, if Godzilla wrecks everything, that would be good (no more bills for a while).
I feel like Godzilla is strong;
I feel like Godzilla is powerful;
I feel like Godzilla always wins (except against King Kong that one time).
Look, we tried things the old way—with a government and public safety and stuff—but it just didn’t work. Now it’s time to try a new way: the way where a hate-filled fifty-thousand-ton reptile burns everything with his atomic fire breath.
Honestly, this endless back-and-forth about whether a Godzilla attack is good or bad for the country is pointless. Just listen—